Video Game Romance Options You Wouldn't Want Your Parents To See
Romance is a lovely thing. As we near February and Valentine's Day, it's a great time to reflect on some of the love stories that have stood the test of time: Tristan and Isolde, Rhett and Scarlett, Mario and Peach, and so on.
Yes, even video games have given us more than a few strong examples of video game power couples. With classics of the genre being built around a story of a hero rescuing his damsel from certain doom and RPGs that encourage multiple romance options to advance the plot, romance has become as integral to video games as it has with all other forms of mass media.
But that's not to say that all of these romances are equal in their poignancy and sweetness. Some are downright embarrassing and awkward. It's almost always nice to be able to tell your family how you met your significant other. Love stories, by and large, are meant to be shared. But just like you probably don't want to bring the wrong person home to meet mom and dad, there are some video game romances that you wouldn't want your folks to see. Let's take a look at a couple of those.
Don't hate the game, hate the player - Persona 5
This is an example of a Valentine's Day gone horribly wrong, with only the player to blame. Persona 5 offers multiple romance options, many of which impact the story and character progression in interesting ways. However, it's easy to get carried away and make things very awkward for the protagonist.
For instance, if you date all of the optional romantic partners, they'll figure out that you've been playing them, and they're not happy. On the day after Valentine's Day, all of the protagonist's beaus will arrive at his place at the same time to confront him. Naturally, this isn't the kind of thing our silent protagonist can talk his way out of, so the girls all beat the tar out of him and break things off.
At least the protagonist gets what's coming to him for cheating on like a dozen people, but imagine what your parents would think watching this. They've just seen you methodically manipulate several women just for a leg up in battle or some extra XP or whatever. It's not a great look, and it'll have them more concerned than ever about when or if you're gonna meet the right person to set you back on track. You know how parents can be.
Larry is the actual worst - Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude
Okay, so Larry Laffer of the Leisure Suit Larry series has never been what one might call a paragon of virtue. This dude has basically been a bad news gross-o since he first slinked onto the scene in 1987. In the years since, he's become rightly regarded as a regular fossil in the video game world, a male chauvinist in the worst sense. His entire existence is built around trying to get women to sleep with him, so he's already not the kind of person you'd expect mom and pop to go gaga over.
However, the absolute worst Larry adventure to show the folks would probably be Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude (get it? Because gross). This game features Larry running wild on a college campus. He gets up to all kinds of gross hijinks in his pursuit of the fine ladies at Walnut Log University (get it? Because gross), including drinking games and err... other mischief. This is all done in order to trick the women of the local sorority house into his bed.
You had better hope your parents don't think this is an accurate representation of dorm life. If they do, you'll be lucky if they even let you step foot outside the house before your 30s.