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The Cheapest Jokes Video Games Have Ever Made

When you pick up a funny video game, you usually expect a mix of good and bad jokes. But sometimes, a serious game will surprise you with a bad pun that comes out of nowhere, totally changing the mood of the scene. While these can be entertaining, some just make us groan with how awful they are. And then there are game developers like Rare who just might have a bad-joke department in their building. They've turned awful puns into an art. And it's an art that we sometimes wish would die.

Every once in a while, you'll stumble across a joke in a game that's so awful it's actually funny. And then there are these jokes. The ones so cheap that you may have physically rolled your eyes at them when they first appeared on your screen. But even when they are obvious, overdone, and just plain cheesy, they still hold a special– or reluctantly special– place in our hearts. Here are some of the cheapest jokes video games have ever made. Be prepared to develop an instant love/hate relationship.

King's Quest has an entire pun garden

Given the title of the sixth King's Quest game, Heir Today, Gone Tomorrow, it's obvious that some truly awful jokes are in store for anyone brave enough to play through this point-and-click adventure. Released by Sierra On-Line in 1992, King's Quest 6: Heir Today, Gone Tomorrow, doesn't pretend to be anything but a silly adventure game. The rampant puns found throughout are brazen and obvious, and in a way, they add to the brand fans of the series have come to expect. Because of this, it takes a lot to make King's Quest fans roll their eyes. But one place in the game puts even the most tolerant of players to the test.

In the appropriately named Pun Garden, players are subjected to some of the worst and most obvious puns in gaming history. All manner of plants grow in this garden, each one more cringeworthy than the last. With names like baby's tears, rotten tomatoes, sour grapes, wall flowers, and very literal snapdragons, Sierra must have hired a pun team specifically for this area. And while a few bad puns here and there are welcome in a game like King's Quest, there is such a thing as crossing the line. This is it.

Diddy's Kong Quest or Diddy Kong's Quest?

Rare's Donkey Kong games are a staple of most gamer's childhood memories. These games were anything but serious and held a fair number of purposefully dumb jokes. The fact that the entire franchise is based on an ape throwing barrels at things is the first hint that you won't find many deep and existential themes. But for all of the cheap jokes made in the Donkey Kong franchise, one of the cheapest is so often overlooked, most gamers don't even know it exists. What makes this feat more impressive is the fact that it's actually the title of one of the games.

Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy's Kong Quest, released in 1995, is a play on words that fits so perfectly, many gamers have read the title for years as "Diddy Kong's Quest." While this is one community-wide phenomena that can't be attributed to the Mandela Effect, it's still impressive that a joke so awful can still fit so well into its environment that it goes widely unnoticed. Because of this, the joke itself is almost redeemed. But the play on words, once seen, can't be unseen, and the fact that you didn't notice its existence for so long only solidifies its groan-worthy nature.

Ace Attorney's interesting cast of characters

The Ace Attorney games are unique in many ways; the visual novel style and humorous storylines set the games apart from others of their kind. They follow the courtroom adventures of the protagonist, attorney Phoenix Wright, and various other defense attorneys. They question witnesses to find inconsistencies and clues vital in making their case in court. The prospect is exciting for any avid puzzle-loving gamer. The characters who take their place in the witness chair are as varied, colorful, and odd as the cases themselves. In order to match this energy, game developers came up with some truly cheesy play-on-words names for these characters.

While some witnesses show up in multiple titles in the Ace Attorney franchise, others only make a brief appearance. But their punny names are memorable enough that even the briefest of appearances allow them to be burned into our memories. With names like Gaspen Payne, Shelly de Killer, Lotta Hart, Wendy Oldbag, Winston Payne, Frank Sahwit, and many more, it's difficult to pick which name is the worst of the lot. But one thing is certain: any one of these names is enough to make a gamer cringe.

Resident Evil 4 should stick to horror

When gamers think of the horror franchise Resident Evil, cheap jokes aren't usually what comes to mind. Dogs jumping through windows, the unhinged Baker family, and some very unpleasant imagery are likely the more prominent go-to for fans of this series. But even though most of your Resident Evil memories are dominated by horrors you want to forget, an even more horrible memory may have been suppressed: the awful "right hand" joke, born in Resident Evil 4.

While protagonist Leon attempts to rescue Ashley in rural Europe, he finds himself not only infected by the plague, but also pursued by the short and persistent Salazar. During a conversation, Salazar says that he "sent his right hand to dispose of [Leon]," to which Leon replies, "Your right hand comes off?" This makes an otherwise tense revelation that a horrible enemy is coming after you into something you just want to forget. The awful joke is glossed over so quickly that it's likely many players don't even remember it, which would be for the best. It might be a good thing for everyone if Resident Evil just stuck to what it does best: gross out even the strongest of players while still terrifying them endlessly.

Haris Pilton wants to give you an inappropriate achievement in WoW

Blizzard's MMO World of Warcraft is known for sneaking pop culture into Azeroth. With their references to games like Portal and shows like Conan the Barbarian, finding all of the hidden Easter eggs is a game in and of itself. And while most of these throwbacks can give us a good laugh, some are just groan-worthy. One such cheap joke comes in the form of an NPC you can find in Shattrath.

The Blood Elf race is already known in WoW as a bit of a joke. The group is often described as a vapid and merely aesthetically pleasing decoration. The community has generally accepted that the Blood Elves were created to be the "pretty horde characters." In order to poke fun at this perception of the pink-skinned race, a Blood Elf named Haris Pilton can be found in Shattrath selling various objects. She looks suspiciously like Paris Hilton, and will sell players a "Gigantique bag." If you purchase this item, you'll obtain an achievement called "My sack is Gigantique." If the Paris Hilton doppelganger wasn't enough for you, the reference to a gigantic sack would more than likely seal the deal.

Guild Wars 2 gives all their cheap jokes to the Mad King

ArenaNet's MMO Guild War's 2 is a perfect example of an RPG that is both serious and unafraid to be silly at the same time. From some of the more comical races like the Quaggans to the recurring airhead NPC Lord Farren, these developers know how to throw a punchline. And then there's the Halloween patch that comes around every year, which brings Mad King Thorn into the world of Tyria. No one is safe from his wrath, or more importantly, his awful jokes.

During the Halloween season, Tyria is transformed into a spooky landscape of pumpkins and candy corn while the lore of Mad King Thorn is learned. The king killed his own son by stuffing candy corn in his mouth and letting him starve to death in a box — dark and morbid for an MMO. But in order to find balance, ArenaNet has also given Mad King Thorn a relatively out-of-place and entirely annoying personality trait: he walks around the city of Lion's Arch reciting terrible jokes. And if bad jokes were enough to kill off the citizens of Lion's Arch, the city would be completely empty by the end of the Halloween season. With everything from jokes about every race found in Tyria, to his banter with his dead son, Mad King Thorn is truly the king of cheap jokes. No one should even try to steal his title.

Oxenfree isn't above sneaking some childish humor into their horror

Night School Studios' debut title Oxenfree was atmospheric and innovative in a number of ways. The ethereal art style mixed with natural yet witty dialogue made it instantly stand out from other indie horror games. But even a game as intense and multi-faceted as Oxenfree couldn't resist dropping a cheap joke in.

Deciding to take a trip to Edward's Island with her friends, Oxenfree's protagonist Alex soon finds that the ghost stories surrounding the island may be more than stories. And while her friends are separated from each other, she and her step-brother Jonas decide to use an old radio tower to call for help from the abandoned island where they're now stranded. Alex mentions to her stepbrother that the building is called Harden tower, though she doesn't know why the memory is so vivid in her mind. Reading the plaque detailing the tower's history, her stepbrother points out that the communications station was named after Major Dick Harden. Even if Alex couldn't remember what made the name of the tower stick out so much, players are sure to get a laugh out of the moment.

GLaDOS wants to scare you to death in Portal 2

For anyone who's played Portal or Portal 2, it's no secret that the evil AI GLaDOS doesn't harbor much love for protagonist Chell. As Chell makes her way through test chamber after test chamber, GLaDOS keeps up a barrage of cheap insults and jokes at the player's expense. And while the cutting remarks may slowly wear Chell down, the biggest hardship is the lack of cake.

Throughout your playthrough of both Portal games, GLaDOS will insult everything from Chell's weight to her lack of intelligence, and even digs at her parentage. But as hurtful (though sometimes hilarious) as these jokes are, the cheapest comes as a two-for-one. Exiting the elevator to begin a new test chamber in Portal 2, GLaDOS informs Chell that people with a guilty conscience are often startled by loud noises. Of course before she can finish her sentence, a train horn blares through the test chamber, sure to startle anyone. This moment earns GLaDOS' prank the title of cheap joke and cheap scare all in one. In her defense, we did kill her only one game earlier. Maybe a bit of revenge is in order for her.

Croaker's jokes in Shovel Knight may be the worst of all

The 2014 2D side-scrolling game Shovel Knight has the aesthetic of a classic Nintendo Entertainment System game. Playing as the Shovel Knight, players must battle their way through various enemies in order to rescue their possessed friend Shield Knight. And while the game itself doesn't exactly claim to be a gritty and serious experience, there are still jokes that can catch a player off-guard with how utterly awful they are.

While making his way through the game, Shovel Knight will run into Croaker, a humanoid frog with an affinity for horrible puns. Because Croaker doesn't do much to aid the protagonist in his quest, his main purpose in Shovel Knight appears to be some sort of ill-thought-out comic relief. With such gems as, "I was afraid as I jumped over the bottomless pit ... but then I got over it" and "I wondered why the Black Knight's shovel was getting bigger ... and then it hit me", Croaker's jokes do give players a nice change of pace during tense fighting scenes. Even if they do make us cringe.

The Slime Rancher Slimepedia is a treasure trove of cheap jokes

Ranching simulator Slime Rancher took an already widely explored game genre and managed to turn it into something unique. With the release of their debut game in 2016, developer Monomi Park combined ranching, crafting, combat, and exploration with the most adorable slimes ever to grace video games. But in a game as lighthearted (or not) as Slime Rancher, there are plenty of opportunities for cheap jokes.

Most of the bad jokes in this game come in the form of terrible puns and plays on words. But the Slimepedia is an absolute gold mine of cheap jokes. For any slime rancher worth their weight in Newbucks, the Slimepedia is a vital piece of literature. Detailing everything from what particular slimes like to eat, to the danger level each slime poses for ranchers, the Slimepedia is the pinnacle of all slime ranching knowledge. But two entries in particular stand out for the eye-roll-inducing text. Under information regarding the explosive Boom Slime, the Slimepedia states, "Careful, these slimes have been known to explo–." And while this joke may be a bit cheap, the Slimepedia entry for the Hunter Slime goes a step further. The entry talks about the Hunter Slime's ability to become almost transparent with the exception of it's glowing eyes. It goes on to say, "This effect is often described by unsuspecting ranchers as 'aaahhhHHHH!"

Doki Doki Literature Club took it a step too far

Cute dating simulator Doki Doki Literature Club is perhaps one of the most deceptively dark games available. Disguised as an anime dating sim with four adorable romantic interests, the Steam store tag of "psychological horror" seems wildly out of place for the pastel pink game. But get further into the story of the Doki Doki Literature Club, and it soon becomes obvious where the "psychological horror" comes into play. As the NPCs become more unstable and the self-aware nature of the AI programing increases, things get scary really fast.

Even while virtual lives are falling apart, however, the president of the Literature Club, Monika, finds time to drop a cheap and extremely dark joke into her dialogue. On the first playthrough of the game, many gamers may not have even noticed the subtle dig, but on a second playthrough it can be seen in all its tasteless glory. On the morning that the protagonist's childhood friend Sayori hangs herself, the player finds themselves in a club meeting, wondering where she might be. And during a conversation with the self-aware Monika, she mentions that "you kind of left [Sayori] hanging" that morning. Clever or not, the joke was still a cheap shot.